Are you comparing?

I don’t consider myself to be a jealous or envious person, but I do a lot of comparisons!  

As I reflect on my past younger comparisons, I have compared my body and hair at least a million times. If I looked like that girl, I would be so much more confident! I have compared my life and decided if I was just a dress size or two smaller, all my problems would be handled.   If my hair would do that, I would feel so much better about myself. If I could pull off a messy bun like that girl, I would feel much more comfortable. Look at this stupid little bun..

I have compared my income... “if I made X amount of money, my life would be great like theirs too.”  I have compared my marriage, my family, my car, my job, my life, my faith, my whatever else, and I am sure I have made a comparison to something or someone.

Why?

Recently, a bible study I am attending pointed out that we are all insecure.  No matter what, we all have a natural layer of insecurity.

So do I compare myself to others because they look secure?  Ding Ding Ding - we have a winner!!!

Not too long ago, I was comparing my life to a woman that is doing amazing things, and I am glad for her, but when I compare my picture, it doesn’t look as pretty as hers..At least not to me.  But you know what? I am only showing the polished picture myself! My facebook posts are mostly only sunshine and happy days. I am 100% sure hers is the exact same.

As I was pointing out her beautiful perfections, my husband reminds me, ”Melissa, it takes hard work to be perfect. Our life is pretty perfect and we work damn hard to keep it that way..”  He is exactly right. Our life looks perfect from the outside looking in, but it’s not. We work really hard to keep the house clean, the yard nice, the cars nice, the kids alive, and the bills paid.  

I am Melissa - the only one God made, and I am walking my path.  I am on my journey. You are on your journey. You have your own mountains and I have mine.  We are not supposed to all be alike. We are supposed to be different. We are supposed to stand out.  We are not meant to be just like our neighbor. We are not meant to be a cookie cutter. We are meant to be beautiful, loud, short, tall, fluffy, not so fluffy, rich and poor.  We all have our own “cross to bare” - our own issue to deal with. We all have our path, and some other journeys are so much harder than mine!!

A book I read recently said, “We miss the miracle for the mess.”  Stop looking at your mess and see your beautiful painting.

“We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves.  When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.””  2 Corinthians 10:12

I understand that to mean: We will never measure up to someone else.  We are not to be compared to others. We are unique and supposed to be that way.  We are being foolish when we try to run the same race as our neighbor. You will never be satisfied.  

“Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.  For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.” 2 Corinthians 10:17

What I take from that is, it's not about me and what I can do.  Life is not about what they have and what I don’t have. Life is about living the life God intended you to have.  God intended you to have a full and loved life. Like no one else! All the good things we have, we should boast about what God has done and how good He is to us!  All the good things in our lives are from God.

Even the most perfect person and life is flawed.  Look for the beauty in your mess. If you can’t see it, ask God to change your heart and show it to you.

I am going to stop comparing my life to others.  I am going choose to see the miracle in my mess. I may have to remind myself everyday, but I am going to stop the comparisons.

Be Different Folks!